From vampire jokes, witch jokes and ghost jokes, we've rounded up some of our favourite clean, corny and clever Halloween jokes that are sure to get a chuckle (or maybe a groan) out of everyone this Autumn.
It's that spooky time of year when Halloween films and songs get played, every doorway gets decked out with pumpkins and creepy decor and we all rediscover our sweet tooth. However, while Halloween is typically considered a scary celebration, it doesn't have to be. In fact there are lots of fun crafts and Halloween games toddlers or young children can get involved with. There's also some brilliant Halloween jokes to bring on a grin and make it all a little bit less frightening. Your little one can learn their favourites to tell their friends and family – there is nothing more adorable than a toddler telling a joke!
In fact learning to appreciate and re-tell jokes is an important step in a child's intellectual development. Joking is great for growing brains (although we are not talking growing brains in Frankenstein's lab) and imagination begins to appear in children around 12-18 months and you can start to encourage imaginative play. Interestingly, this corresponds with the time when children are starting to copy parents’ jokes – making them more active in the production of their own brand of humour. Indeed, children as young as seven months can deliberately repeat any behaviours that elicit laughs, such as a funny face or a game of peek-a-boo.
A developing imagination is so important for a child, so encourage them as much as possible by getting creative with games, laughing together and telling jokes. Plus, jokes are also good for ageing brains too, which is a a great reason for grandparents and grandchildren to share the fun of telling jokes together.
Best Halloween jokes for kids
Best Halloween knock knock jokes
1. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don’t cry! I didn’t mean to scare you.
2. Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting ghost.
Interrupting gho–
BOO!
3. Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Witch
Witch Who?
Witch way to the haunted house?
4. Knock, Knock,
Who's there?
Doughnut
Doughnut who?
Doughnut worry, it's just a Halloween joke.
5. Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Police
Police who?
Police give me some candy?
Best pumpkin Halloween jokes
6. What did the pumpkin say when he was asked if he wanted a haircut?
No thanks, it's vine.
7. What is the biggest pumpkin in the pumpkin patch called?
Plumpkin
8. Why was the jack o'lantern so sad?
He felt hollow inside
9. Why was Cinderella so bad at football?
She had a pumpkin for a coach
10. Why do Jack o' lanterns sit on people's porches?
They don't have the guts to knock on the door
11. What is black, white, orange and waddles?
A penguin with a pumpkin
Best mummy Halloween jokes
12. What do mummies like listening to on Halloween?
Wrap music!
13. Why didn’t the mummy have any friends?
He was too wrapped up in himself.
14. What do mummies eat for lunch?
Wraps
15. What did the pharaoh say when he had a nightmare?
Where's my mummy?
16. Why was the mummy so tense?
It was all wound up
Best skeleton Halloween jokes
17. What is a skeleton’s favourite instrument?
A trombone.
18. What did the skeleton say to the person he was mad at?
I have a bone to pick with you
19. What is a skeleton's favourite kind of art?
Skull-ptures
20. Why didn't the skeleton go to the party?
He had nobody to go with
21. Why was the skeleton so messy?
He was a lazy bones
Best witch Halloween jokes
22. What was the witch’s favourite subject in school?
Spelling.
23. How does a witch tell time?
She looks at her witch-watch
24. What do witches put on their hair?
Scare spray
25. How do you make a witch scratch?
Take away the ‘w’!
26. What do you call two witches who live together?
Broom mates
Best vampire Halloween jokes
27. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
28. What’s a vampire’s favourite fruit?
A necktarine!
29. Why don't vampires have more friends?
Because they're a pain in the neck!
30. Where does Dracula keep his money?
In a blood bank.
31. What type of dog does a vampire have?
A bloodhound
Best ghost Halloween jokes
32. Which ghost is the best dancer?
The Boogie Man!
33. What is a ghost's nose full of?
Boooooogers!
34. What kind of mistake does a ghost make?
A boo-boo!
35. What is a ghost’s favourite dessert?
Boo-berries and I Scream!
36. What’s a ghoul’s favourite game on Halloween?
Hide-and-ghost-seek.
37. How do ghosts search the Web?
They use ghoul-gle.
The M&B team's favourite Halloween jokes
38. What's big, scary and has three wheels?
A monster riding a tricycle!
39. What monster plays tricks on Halloween?
Prank-enstein!
40. What do the birds sing on Halloween?
Twick or Tweet!
41. What is a ghost’s favourite meal?
Spook-ghetti.
42. Why didn’t the coffee bean go to the Halloween party?
Because it was grounded.
43. Why don’t ghosts go out in the rain?
It dampens their spirit
44. Where do celebrities go at Halloween?
Mali-boo
45. Why are ghosts bad at lying?
You can see straight through them
46. What do witches order at hotels?
Broom service
Why should you tell jokes at Halloween?
We think a few spooky jokes at Halloween will really brighten the spirits (ha ha) and make it fun for everyone. If your little one is all dressed up in their favourite Halloween costume, but a little bit nervous with all the scary decorations and other creepy costumes around, a Halloween joke or two will cheer them up. Plus, if you are hosting a Halloween party it's a good idea to know a few jokes to make every one laugh. Trick or treaters coming to your door will also get a real trick or treat when you surprise them with not just Halloween sweets, but a bonus joke as well!
Laura Healy is a Commercial Content Writer for Mother&Baby. She is a mum-of-two girls and loves writing about all things parenting, she is particularly interested in the toddler years and eco-friendly baby products, as well as children’s literature. She has a PhD in Creative Writing and has published short stories in the UK and Ireland, as well as previously writing freelance for her local paper.