Halloween jokes for kids

laughing halloween kids

by Stephanie Spencer |
Updated on

From vampire jokes, witch jokes and ghost jokes, we've rounded up some of our favourite clean, corny and clever Halloween jokes that are sure to get a chuckle (or maybe a groan) out of everyone.

It's that spooky time of year when Halloween films and songs get played, every doorway gets decked out with pumpkins and we all rediscover our sweet tooth. It's also when the ghosts and ghouls come visiting and we all enjoy getting good and scared. There are so many sides to Halloween that it doesn't have to be a scare-fest for tots. In fact there are lots of fun crafts and gamesthey can get involved with. There's also some brilliant Halloween jokes to bring on a grin. They can learn their favourites to tell their friends and family – there is nothing more adorable than a toddler telling a joke!

In fact learning to appreciate and re-tell jokes is an important step in a child's intellectual development. Joking is great for growing brains (not growing brains as in Frankenstein's lab). Imagination begins to appear in children around 12-18 months. Interestingly, this corresponds with the time when children are starting to copy parents’ jokes – making them more active in the production of their own brand of humour. Indeed, children as young as seven months can deliberately repeat any behaviours that elicit laughs, such as a funny face or a game of peek-a-boo.

A developing imagination is so important for a child, so encourage them as much as possible by getting creative with games, laughing together and telling jokes.

Jokes are also good for ageing brains, a great reason for grandparents and grandchildren to share the fun of telling jokes.

Best halloween jokes for kids

1. What do mummies like listening to on Halloween?
Wrap music!

2. What is a skeleton’s favourite instrument?
A trombone.

3. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

4. What was the witch’s favourite subject in school?

5. Which ghost is the best dancer?
The Boogie Man!

6. What's big, scary and has three wheels?
A monster riding a tricycle!

  1. What is a ghost's nose full of?

8. How does a witch tell time?
She looks at her witch-watch

9. What’s a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A necktarine!

10. What’s a ghoul’s favorite game on Halloween?

How about getting your toddler a matching outfit to go with their one-liner? Here are some great fancy dress ideas...

  1. What do witches put on their hair?
    Scare spray

12. What is a ghost’s favourite dessert?
Boo-berries and I Scream!

13. What monster plays tricks on Halloween?

14. What kind of mistake does a ghost make?
A boo-boo!

15. What do the birds sing on Halloween?
Twick or Tweet!

16. How do you make a witch scratch?
Take away the ‘w’!

17. What do vampires fear the most?
Tooth decay

18. Why do witches wear name tags?
So they will know which witch is which.

19. What does a pirate look for although it's always right behind him?
His booty

20. Why don't skeletons like to go to parties?
Because they have nobody to dance with!

21. What do you call two witches who live together?

22. Why don't vampires have more friends?
Because they're a pain in the neck!

23. What's a ghost's favourite fruit?

24. Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Boo who?
Don’t cry! I didn’t mean to scare you.

25. How do ghosts search the Web? 
They use ghoul-gle.

26. Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
No body.

27. What is a ghost’s favourite meal?

28. Where does Dracula keep his money?
In a blood bank.

29. Why didn’t the coffee bean go to the Halloween party?
Because it was grounded.

30. Why didn’t the mummy have any friends? 
He was too wrapped up in himself.

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